Runs


Bartender Appreciation Day Hash

When
Saturday, Jun 30 at 3:00 PM

Where
Hidden Valley Park (actual address isn't found on this floppin' thing...LFH)

Hares
Keys to the Titty & Projectile Dogshit

Cost
$6

What you get
Cum one, cum all! It's time again to appease the Gods of libation with, who else, but your favorite ball licking hounds! It's the last day of the month as well as Bartender Appreciation Day - so honestly, is there any better way to spend your Saturday afternoon? You can thus appreciate yourself after trail, or join in at the on-after party somewhere downtown 😘

Ties and Boxers Hash

When
Saturday, Jun 16 at 3:00 PM

Where
5266 Hollister, Goleta

Hares
Pic n Honor

Cost
$6

Details
Bring a vessel, a virgin, your best necktie, & fanciest pair o boxer shorts, id ( unless you have a silver/platinum mane like ours!), & $$ if you don't like beer.

Additional Info
Cum on out for a little fun in the sun in Noleta! There will be shiggy, really flat trail, doggie friendly, but not so for strollers

Oscar Week Bastard Hash

When
Tuesday, Feb 27 at 6:15 PM

Where
Parking lot behind Home Depot in Goleta Marketplace (6975 Marketplace Dr, Isla Vista, California 93117)

Hares
Jizzzzzzzzzzzzz

Cost
$6

Additional Info
The lovely, laughter-filled Jizzzzz will lead you bastards on a trail filled with golden awards at each BN. No acceptance speech required to receive.

Follow this hare down the rabbit s&^thole

When
Saturday, Jan 27 at 2:00 AM

Where
La Mesa Park

Hares
Jizzzzzzzzzzzzz

Cost
$6

Details
vessel, virgin, a piece of string, and hat of your choosing to hash in

Additional Info
First H3SOB hash of 2018! Let's pop that 2018 Saturday hash cherry! This hare has nothing but the shittiest trail in store for you. Show up to start with your silliest mad hat or any fun little hat to put on your head (head? Who said head?)

The Imperial March GHOTT Hash

When
Thursday, Jan 25 at 6:15 PM

Where
Parking lot of the Imperial Lounge (320 S Kellogg Ave, Goleta, CA 93117)

Hares
Bone Star & Just Dave

Cost
$6

Details
a headlamp (or substitute with a light saber), cash, ID, whistles, virgins, knowledge of the Force

Additional Info
Having already invaded the Imperial for happy hour last month, the hash will "strike back" again for a shitty trail (free of fire and ash!) through the Goodland of Goleta. Prelube and on after at the Imperial.

XXXtra Swankfancy NYE Pube Crawl

When
Sunday, Dec 31 at 8:00 PM

Where
The Crocodile Restaurant and Bar (2819 State St, Santa Barbara, California 93105)

Hares
TBD

Cost
Self-funded pub crawl to ring in the New Year!

Additional Info
Get your shit together, put on a pair of pants if you want, and meet all your favorite halfminds for a filthy New Year's Eve self-funded pub crawl in the festively ash-coated streets of beautiful Santa Barbara. All the local hash celebrities will be there. You will be too, if'n you know what's good for you. Cheers, and On-On!

XXXTra Trashy XXXmas Hash -Updated for Thomas

When
Saturday, Dec 16 at 2:00 PM

Where
Mel's Lounge (209 W Carrillo St, Santa Barbara, CA 93101)

Hares
Jizzzzzzzzzzzzz

Cost
$6

Details
N95 Mask, festive cheer, shiggy socks, vessels, virgins, and your gayest apparel (think Snt Hrd jean shorts). Air quality is still pretty poor due to Thomas Fire so we will be walking to a few bars to hang out!

Additional Info
You can park at the Carrillo commuter lot and head to Mel's. Start pitchers will be there for consumption but this hash will be a self funded pubcrawl where we will consume beer dressed in N95 masks and holiday cheer! Come be trashy with all your favorite H3SoB peeps

On After
Somewhere with food to soak up the booze

The Bastard Festivus Returns

When
Saturday, Dec 9 at 1:30 PM

Where
Ben Page Youth Center, Santa Barbara, CA (4540 Hollister Ave, Santa Barbara, CA 93110)

Hares
Snot Hard

Cost
$12 - meal provided at on after!

What you get
Approximate itinerary: 1:30 - Prelube to construct the aluminum pole Santa Bastard style 2:00 - The Airing of Grievances - A short circle of crimes and accusations to tell your fellow hashers all the ways they have disappointed you over the past year. 2:15 - Hare off 2:30 - Pack out On after will feature a barbecue dinner and dismantling of the aluminum pole.

Additional Info
D'erections: From Carpinteria and Ventura - Take 101 North to the State Street/San Marcos Pass exit (Exit 101B). Get into the left lane. At the traffic light, turn left onto State Street and go 1.4 miles. (State Street becomes Hollister at about the railroad crossing.) Ben Page Youth Center will be on your right. Once entering, wind your way past the three ball fields and park in the back parking lot to your right. Wait, you're not at run start yet. After parking, look for hash marks to lead you the last 150 yards. From San Luis Obispo - Take 101 South to the Turnpike Road exit (Exit 103) and turn right at the traffic light onto Turnpike, getting into the left lane. At the Hollister traffic light turn left and go about 0.7 miles. Ben Page Youth Center will be on your left. Once entering, wind your way past the three ball fields and park in the back parking lot on your right. Wait, you're not at run start yet. After parking look for hash marks to lead you the last 150 yards.

North South 2017

When
Friday, Nov 24 at 6:00 PM

Where
Paso Robles CA

Hares
TBD

Cost
Early bird registration price is $120.69 if you register before July 31st! Aug 1st - Sep 30th price is $135.69. On Oct 1st the price goes up to $155.69 and will stay at that price until the event date or we are full (250 max!).

What you get
Price includes 3 days of trail, Beer, dinner on Friday and Saturday, Beer, lunch on Sunday, Beer, and fabulous schwag. (Cutoff date for guaranteed giveaways will be announced later.) Registration/payment info cumming soon! Mark your calendars!!

Links
  • Registration

  • H3SOB Golden (Shower) Analversary

    When
    Saturday, Sep 23 at 3:00 PM

    Where
    Carrillo commuter parking log (400 W. Carrillo Street)

    Hares
    TBD

    Cost
    $6

    Details
    Golden attire, bladder full of urine (Budlight), vessels, and vigins. More details to cum